I see him every day, and want so much for him to talk to me, but he usually does not.
I talk to him, and he doesn't answer me. I try to get him to notice me, but he's interested in other things.
I spend a lot of time watching him walk away from me.
When he walks away, I feel a longing in my chest. It's a heavy, pulling sensation on my heart and in my throat; it's almost physically painful
There's nothing I can do to change this. I can't insist that he stay, because it will only drive him farther away. I have no choice but to let him be; to watch him walk away.
This is how autism makes me feel: like I'm a high school girl with a crush on a boy who doesn't know I exist.
Not all of the time; just some of the time.
Enough of the time.
Sarah @ The Fence · 692 weeks ago
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sherilinr · 692 weeks ago
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tulpen · 692 weeks ago
xoxoxoxo
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Beth Arky · 692 weeks ago
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Tracy (calormom) · 692 weeks ago
Dani G · 692 weeks ago
lump in throat
frowny face
My recent post *This Moment*
pugariffic 41p · 692 weeks ago
"nope!" and runs upstairs to his room.
*sigh*
Keep trying.. maybe one day.. he'll say yes :)
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mamagaytko · 692 weeks ago
mamagaytko · 692 weeks ago
autismwatches 29p · 692 weeks ago
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Claire · 692 weeks ago
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JennyBean · 692 weeks ago
Handflapper · 692 weeks ago
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@LaliQuin · 692 weeks ago
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Jim Reeve · 692 weeks ago
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blogginglily 73p · 692 weeks ago
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Forgotten · 692 weeks ago
(((HUGS)))
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Patty · 692 weeks ago
andrea · 692 weeks ago
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Mandy · 692 weeks ago
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jacqui · 692 weeks ago
lancecake 59p · 692 weeks ago
Jessica · 692 weeks ago
Love you. xo
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Not a Perfect Mom · 692 weeks ago
wow...
painful...
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byclaudya 69p · 692 weeks ago
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chocolatewasteland 50p · 692 weeks ago
Jen · 692 weeks ago
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smili76 42p · 692 weeks ago
((Hugs))
quirkyandlaughing 18p · 692 weeks ago
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Chunky Mama · 692 weeks ago
I'm sorry that it makes you feel that way at ANY time.
Stephanie 102p · 692 weeks ago
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Sarah · 691 weeks ago
Amy lla.princess · 691 weeks ago
More than words can express. Their expressions of love are diffetent and unique just like them
Love isn't easy. Raising our boys isn't easy. But if it was, we really wouldnt appreciate them as much as we do. (Hugs) mama
Amy lla.princess · 691 weeks ago
Jenn@Fox in the City · 691 weeks ago
My recent post Great Expectations
Melinda · 691 weeks ago
On holding the baby of a friend
(After seven years as the mother of a child with autism)
I hug and nuzzle; brush my cheek to his.
He giggles, grabs my nose and grins at me.
I turn away, afraid someone will see
the tear I shed at how much fun this is.
I'm sprung: 'Clucky again ? Another son ?'
How can I tell her so she'll understand?
I had so much of this to give. I planned
to shower it all on mine. He wanted none.
I wonder whether mothers get a store
of child-affection, swelling in the chest
like milk come in, demanding to be used?
Does having to suppress it make you sore ?
My WebMD has nothing to suggest.
I borrow babies. They reduce the bruise.
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Shell · 691 weeks ago
chosenchaos 93p · 691 weeks ago
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K A B L O O E Y · 691 weeks ago
My recent post Because I’m Ashamed AND Lazy
Lauren · 690 weeks ago
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gingerheaddad 22p · 687 weeks ago